Passover: The Endurance Event of the Jewish Holidays

This post originally ran last year on In the Powder Room.

I remember Jon Stewart joking back in the late 1990s (does that make me old?) that Judaism was the best religion because you could wipe out all of your sins in just one day:

Yom Kippur. Greatest Jewish holiday ever. The Jewish day of atonement. You don’t eat for one day, all your sins for the year are wiped clean. Beat that with your little “Lent.” What is Lent? Forty days of absolution. Forty days to one day. Even in sin you’re paying retail.

This one magical day of Yom Kippur occurs in the fall, and with my clean slate firmly intact, I was able to waltz through the tinsel-garlanded end of December without self-pity, knowing that my religion was pretty great, too. What it might lack in jolly ho-ho-hos it certainly made up for in quick-n-easy absolution of sin.

But when springtime comes, my Jewish pride sometimes has a momentary pause. Whereas Hanukkah can literally hold a candle to Christmas, Passover offers cardboard-like food and a story of despair in the desert while Easter happily flaunts pastel baskets filled with jelly beans and chocolate bunnies.

Not only that, but Passover is the marathon of Jewish holidays, with eight days and eight nights of observance - carb-free, beer-free observance.

But first, let me begin at the beginning.

Before the Passover holiday even starts the entire house needs to be cleaned from top to bottom. If you are more pious, this cleaning must be done by feather and candlelight. And if you're lucky like me, with three small children helpfully screaming, "MOM!!!!! YOU MISSED A SPOT!!!!!"

Once the deep clean is over, all food with leavening of any kind must be located and thrown away. Sure, you might be able to live without bagels and pasta for a week, but this isn't just a holiday about eight days of carb-free living, this holiday encompasses so many more things on its list of Do Not Eat. So goodbye yummy processed foods laden with corn syrup. Goodbye Cheetos and Doritos. Goodbye mommy's hidden stash of gummy bears, see ya next week!

The first two nights of Passover are seders, which include the re-telling of the holiday story and a large festive meal. The seder can't even begin until sundown, which this year was around 7:00 pm. Then the kids have to listen semi-quietly to a very loooong story that includes boils, locusts, pestilence, and even the slaying of children. It's a lot, even for the most well-behaved kids.

As a treat for the children, and our only way of keeping them going through each and every story and song, is the promise that a special piece of matzoh, called the Afikoman, has been hidden, and that once they find the Afikoman and return it to the table, they'll receive money or a small gift.

And then - I kid you not - that matzoh is served for dessert. Afikoman literally means "that which comes after," aka dessert. Okay, I kid a little, there are other desserts, but not the kind that scream special occasion. There are fruit compotes and sponge cakes made from potato starch. There are cookies that aren't quite right which have been fashioned from chopped nuts and shredded coconut. And don't even get me started on the attempts to liven up matzoh with various coatings from carob to caramel.

Even after forty-eight hours of late nights and mornings that greet you with Kosher-for-Passover cereal and boiled eggs instead of bagels and muffins, the fun is just beginning. There are still six more days of the Passover holiday. And this is where the real endurance test kicks in big time. Here you are living carb-free and junk food-free, still tired from your pre-holiday cleaning, when the final endurance test is upon you: the kids are home from school. And not just for a few days, but for the entirety of the holiday.

Just you and the kids, and the joy of reminding them 683 times an hour that no, there's no cake, no cookies, not even a graham cracker in the house. But look kids, there's matzoh pizza! Matzoh mac 'n cheese! Matzoh chicken nuggets!

And did I mention that there is also no beer in the house? Or doughnuts. Or cookie dough ice cream. Nor will there be anytime soon.

But thank G-d, there's wine. It may be Kosher-for-Passover wine, but at least it pairs well with matzoh.

Passover Gefilte Fish Revisited

A couple of weeks ago, I posted about my kids and gefilte fish here.


Then, I did not serve gefilte fish at Passover because I didn't get around to getting any, and I'm very picky about where I like it from (i.e., not the grocery).


And then, I read that there was some massive gefilte fish shortage this year, and even people who did not forget to serve gefilte fish at their Passover dinner still couldn't serve gefilte fish because it could not be found anywhere, for love or money.


So of course now that I knew I couldn't have any, I needed to have some gefilte fish as if all my Passover happiness, and my family's Passover happiness, depended on it.


So with a bit of searching, I got some gefilte fish. From the local fish store, where I was told to my surprise that yes he was aware of the gefilte fish shortage, and yes, that in all his years in the business he had never, ever seen so many angry, sad, disappointed, unhappy, and just truly devastated customers as he had in those days leading up to Passover when he had to tell them he was out of gefilte fish.


But when I was there on the third night of Passover, some gefilte fish had returned to his ice covered shelves. So I purchased some of the now truly a miracle they're here! chopped fish, and brought it home and served it to my delighted children.

And even more delicious, the gefilite fish was paired with homegrown, homemade horseradish made by Cousin Mary.

And thus, the tradition of gefilte fish on the third night of Passover began.

Make A Matzoh House! Make A Mess! Make Memories!

I love doing craft projects with my kids.

I love asking my mom to help us with some inane part of these craft projects, like finding 82 silver triangle shaped buttons, or in this case, a cardboard model on which to build a matzoh house which I was sure would end up looking something like this:

Alas, our matzoh house, it did not.

However what our matzoh house lacked in suitability as a Passover Seder centerpiece, it made up for as fodder for CraftFail. Read all about how not to make a matzoh house at Martha's Matzoh Mansion.

And many thanks to Robyn who not only described my ramshackle matzoh home as totally, utterly and completely Martha's fault, but created this as well:

Happy Passover!

The Ten Modern Plagues from Midrash Manicures

Part of  the Passover seder is going over the ten plagues that were said to befall the pharaoh when he refused to free the Jewish people from slavery all those many years ago. Some of the plagues, like lice, are relatable, maybe even a little too relatable. Others, like boils, seem very antiquated.






I love that Midrash Manicures updated the ten plagues to reflect the modern scourges of our time, and especially of this particular year when both Snow Days and the Polar Vortex get, rightfully so, a shout-out:

To this list of modern plagues I would also add lines at the Post Office, bank and DMV and the carpool pick-up system at just about every school my kids have ever attended.


Also, on my list would have to be low signal on my phone or, even worse, no WiFi.


And last but not least, clearly Martha Stewart's Matzoh House is a modern plague of the worst kind, it doesn't even think it is one - but more on that tomorrow.


What would be on your list of modern plagues?


Not a sponsored post, just think these are soo cool as is all of the Passover Nail Art available at Midrash Manicures.

It wouldn't be Passover without gefilite fish

Passover two years ago, kids and gefilte fish:



Some people say the major difference between the generations before and young people today is that they don't eat gefilite fish, but my kids are keeping the traditions of their ancestors alive and well.


Chag Sameach!

More Photos of People Eating Matzoh

Apparently I like to take lots of photos of people, and stuffed animal ducks, eating matzoh.


I like that Mario got some matzoh, too.


Happy Passover!

Matzoh: A Passover Love-Hate Story

Last year when Passover began, Kay made a super-fun photo montage of how much she loves matzoh. Loves it.

Then, by the middle of the eight day holiday -- during which no bread or leavened foods of any kind can be eaten -- Kay's matzoh eating photo collage looked like this:



Not surprisingly, this is the photo compilation from the last day of Passover:



I think I sorta agree! After all, Passover is an Endurance Event.

Happy Passover! Chag Sameach!

My Mom's Recipe for the World's Best Passover Macaroons

For Passover, my family always has macaroons. This is the traditional dessert for many celebrating the holiday,as these tasty cookies do not require flour, which is forbidden over the eight day festival.


This year, my mom brought her recipe as well as the four required ingredients, to my house and made these easy, and delicious, cookies with her delighted granddaughters. They were the best macaroons I had ever eaten, so Grandma kindly gave us her “secret” recipe so we could make them again.

Here’s the recipe:



P.S. My mom’s secret recipe is actually Mark Bittman’s Ultimate Minimalist Macaroons. But shhh, don’t tell her I know the truth.

The Best Passover Matzo Balls - My Recipe for Homemade Matzo Balls

Making homemade matzo balls is really easy. Here's how:

PERFECT MATZO BALLS
Yield: 8 regular size or 6 big matzo balls

Ingredients:

2 tablespoons vegetable oil

2 eggs
1/2 cup Manischewitz® Matzo Meal
2 tablespoons seltzer water

Itty-bitty pinch of salt

Directions:
1. In a medium bowl, beat the eggs.

2. Add the vegetable oil, matzo meal and seltzer water and then mix all of the ingredients together at once - not one at a time.

3. Cover and put in the refrigerator for at least 30 minutes. A real 30 minutes.

4. While your matzo ball mix is chillin' in the fridge, boil about 8 to 10 cups of water (approx. 2 quarts), or of chicken stock/soup/broth if that's how you'll be serving the matzo balls.

5. When the water (or chicken stock/soup/broth) is at a full rolling boil - a real rolling boil - it's ready for your matzo balls. Wet your hands with a little water and form your chilled matzo batter into balls, about the size of a walnut or a little larger.

6. Reduce the heat on the stove and gently plop the matzo balls into the pot. If you did not let the water truly boil first, your matzo balls will not poof correctly, so much sure you are patient and don't add them to the pot too soon.

7. Cover the pot tightly and let the matzo balls lull around in the water for at least 40 minutes - a real 40 minutes. You can't really over-cook matzo balls, but I've learned the hard way you can under-cook them. So be patient!

8. That's it! If you're serving the matzo balls in soup, which I think is pretty much the only way to eat matzo balls, either heat them in chicken soup/stock/broth instead of water in the initial preparation in Steps 4 and 5 above, or reheat them by simmering in soup before serving.

A few hints:
1. Do not double the recipe. I'm not sure why you can't but it doesn't work. If you need to make lotsa matzo balls, just make it twice using two separate bowls, than boil in two separate pots.

2. While you can make matzo balls ahead of time and freeze, I don't. Too many issues, and too complicated to do it right. Instead, I make the matzo balls up to two days before I want to eat them, and just store them in liquid (chicken stock or broth works best) in the refrigerator.

3. Make sure you use plain seltzer, flavored seltzer doesn't work. Also, plain seltzer sells-out all the time before Passover - so buy it early!

4. I make my matzo balls with just a tiny pinch of salt because that's how I roll. You may want to add more than that when you're making them if you are a more salty kinda person.

5. This recipe is for fluffy matzo balls, not the dense "golf ball" ones.


Note: This version is adapted from the recipe on the side of the Manischewitz® Matzo Meal canister.

I was not compensated for this post, just sharing my love of a good matzo ball.

Passover will be here in just eight days!

Did you know that in exactly eight days the Passover holiday begins? I know this because that is also the day my children start their extended vacation from school - yay!


To celebrate the coming holiday I'll be sharing our favorite Passover recipes, crafts and books all week starting tomorrow.

And if you're in New Jersey or New York City, check out all the great Passover goings-on at BaristaKids.com: Celebrate Passover with Great Events, Recipes, Books and More.

Chag Pesach Sameach!

Recipe: How to Make Perfect Homemade Matzo Balls

Making homemade matzo balls is really easy. Here's how:

PERFECT MATZO BALLS
Yield: 8 regular size or 6 big matzo balls

Ingredients:

2 tablespoons vegetable oil

2 eggs
1/2 cup Manischewitz® Matzo Meal
2 tablespoons seltzer water

Itty-bitty pinch of salt

Directions:
1. In a medium bowl, beat the eggs.

2. Add the vegetable oil, matzo meal and seltzer water and then mix all of the ingredients together at once - not one at a time.

3. Cover and put in the refrigerator for at least 30 minutes. A real 30 minutes.

4. While your matzoh ball mix is chillin' in the fridge, boil about 8 to 10 cups of water (approx. 2 quarts), or of chicken stock/soup/broth if that's how you'll be serving the matzo balls.

5. When the water (or chicken stock/soup/broth) is at a full rolling boil - a real rolling boil - it's ready for your matzoh balls. Wet your hands with a little water and form your chilled matzoh batter into balls, about the size of a walnut or a little larger.

6. Reduce the heat on the stove and gently plop the matzo balls into the pot. If you did not let the water truly boil first, your matzo balls will not poof correctly, so much sure you are patient and don't add them to the pot too soon.

7. Cover the pot tightly and let the matzo balls lull around in the water for at least 40 minutes - a real 40 minutes. You can't really over-cook matzo balls, but I've learned the hard way you can under-cook them. So be patient!

8. That's it! If you're serving in soup, which I think is pretty much the only way to eat matzo balls, either heat them in chicken soup/stock/broth instead of water in the initial preparation in Steps 4 and 5 above, or reheat them by simmering in soup before serving.

A few hints:
1. Do not double the recipe. I'm not sure why you can't but it doesn't work. If you need to make lotsa matzo balls, just make it twice using two separate bowls, than boil in two separate pots.

2. While you can make matzoh balls ahead of time and freeze, I don't. Too many issues, and too complicated to do it right. Instead, I make the matzo balls up to two days before I want to eat them, and just store them in liquid (chicken stock or broth works best) in the refrigerator.

3. Make sure you use plain seltzer, flavored seltzer doesn't work. Also, plain seltzer sells-out all the time before Passover - buy it early!

4. I make my matzo balls with just a tiny pinch of salt because that's how I roll. You may want to add more than that when you're making them if you are a more salty kinda person.

5. This recipe is for fluffy matzoh balls, not the dense "golf ball" ones.

Note: This version is adapted from the recipe on the side of the Manischewitz® Matzo Meal canister.

I was not compensated for this post, just sharing my love of a good matzo ball.

Chag Sameach! Happy Passover!

Two-fisting the matzoh.

We celebrated Passover last night with our traditional abbreviated Seder, which my kids still think is too long. I can't wait for their first visit to a friend's house during college when they finally experience what a real Seder is like.
And while I will always be a fan of our shortened style, I do feel a little badly that we skipped all of the songs this year. And that for the first time in as long as I can remember my matzoh balls didn't turn out quite right. Oh well.

Minor technical difficulties aside, it was a wonderful night. The kids loved helping with the Seder plate which we always fashion a homemade shank bone for, and add an orange for girl power. Only one of our guests could correctly identify why the orange was on the Seder plate, which honestly was one more than I had guessed would know.

We had a festival meal, delicious wine, and the annual teasing of my nine-year-old about if she would be going to the ER this year (she made a Passover trip to the hospital when she was two to sew up a busted lip, and we predicted correctly then she would now hear about this for every Passover forever).

Afikomen was hidden, and found.

And then dessert: Marshmallow twists, which were dubbed Passover Mallomars:

Now, eight days of Passover cereal and matzoh sandwiches, and next year in Jerusalem. Or in Jersey, but with more singing and better matzoh balls.

Chag Sameach!

Wordless Wednesday: Passover's Over, It's Cookie Time!

For the Eight Days of Passover it is traditional to refrain from eating leavened foods as a reminder of when the Jews fled from Egypt with such haste they didn't have time to wait for their bread to rise.

In our house we keep Passover loosely - essentially eating everything but what I think of as "blatant bread," or as I overheard my daughter telling her friend, "We're not strict, but we're not careless either. We get the Passover cereal."

Needless to say, the kids were happy to go out and get a cookie at (almost) sundown.

Wordless Wednesday - Obligatory Passover Pictures

Monday night was the first night of the eight-night holiday of Passover. We had a great time at our seder, spending it with my brother and his new bride, and our very dear friends who were nice enough to not only lead the seder but to also bring the best apple kugel I've ever eaten.

For those of you who celebrate, the scenes below will look familiar. For those who don't, this is Passover...

Brisket fresh from Citarella in Manhattan, ready to cook:

Toddler eating matzoh:

Seder Plate:

Children noshing gefilte fish before the guests arrive:

And of course, what seder could be complete without guests dressed-up like plagues:

Chag Sameach Pesach!

Three Great Passover Desserts

Passover will be here on Monday. Which means, I'll be cooking between now and then (even on Shabbos, but shhh about that).

I always make the matzoh ball soup ahead of time, as well as a side dish or two. I also make sure my Passover plates and Seder plate are ready to go. And my tablecloth. Where did my "fancy" one go?

This year for Passover I'm also going to make some desserts ahead of time. Passover desserts used to be the brunt of holiday jokes, but today there are so many yummy options.

In researching Passover for an article on Momtrends, I read about a tradition dating back to the '80s (1980s that is) to add an orange to the Seder Plate to represent groups often left out of mainstream Judaism.

I'm not sure if the purists I celebrate Passover with would be ok with adding an orange to the traditional Seder Plate, so I thought instead I'll sneak it in with an orange-themed dessert. I'm planning to make the Food Networks Chocolate Orange Mousse from the Barefoot Contessa as well as this Passover Orange Sponge Cake:

From DianasDesserts.com

And last, there is always the traditional macaroon for dessert. No recipe is better then Mark Bittman's Ultimate Minimalist Macaroon. Using just five ingredients, these were a treat to make with my daughters using my Mom's secret-stolen recipe:

 

Happy Passover! Do you have a favorite holiday recipe? Please leave a link and share in the comments below!

Fun Crafts For Passover - Seder Plates, Handprint Matzoh Covers and a Frog with Handprint Feet!

Passover is one of my favorite holidays, but it also one of the most labor-intensive. It involves burning (at least symbolically) all the chometz in the house, preparing the Seder plate, and cooking a festive meal which is made more challenging since you cannot use any leavening at all. Oh, and you have to keep the no-eating-leavening going for eight days. These eight days, for me, will seem like about eight-hundred days, because my charming daughters are home from the school for the whole entire week.

But enough about that, and on to what Google Analytics tells me you really care about... handprint crafts and art projects for Passover!

Creative Jewish Mom has too many amazing ideas. I visit her blog for inspiration to be crafty with my kids - but I will admit our projects do not end up looking quite as good as hers do.

I am in love with the Ten Plagues Placards for Passover Seder, because the recitation of the ten plagues is a cherished tradition at our annual Seder, and I know this will help get the kids more involved. Best of all, the frog's legs are made with handprints!

Photo from CreativeJewishMom.com

Education.com has directions to Make a "Handy" Matzoh Cover, and it really is a wonderful addition to have as many parts of the Seder meal include items made by the kids who will be there. We have a nice collection of matzoh covers, as well as Cups for Elizah and Seder Plates, all hand-made and all the more precious because they are.

Photo from Education.com

And last, Sucre, spice & everything nice has perhaps the best Passover Kitsch seder plate I've ever seen:

Photo from Sucre and Spice

Look closely, it's all made from candy and was used not on Passover, but on... April Fool's Day.

Chag Sameach Pesach! Next Year in Jerusalem!