Instructions for my Husband: Katy Perry and Russell Brand are not Getting Divorced

Photo from Snarkerati.com

Don't ever try to out-celebrity-gossip me. Ever. It can't be done.

Can't.

Be.

Done.

Katy Perry and Russell Brand are still married. If they weren't, my celebrity gossip mongering self would know.

Sure, there were divorce rumors. But they were rumors. The happy couple is fine. More than fine. They are happy! They haven't been married for a year yet, even by Celebrity-land standards they should have a few more good years left.

Don't believe me? Thanks to Google (as always), irrefutable proof is available in the form of this article from the infallible online news source Snarkerati.com: Katy Perry & Russell Brand Debunk Divorce Rumors.

Also, Gwyneth Paltrow is married. And yes, to the same person she's always been married to, still the guy from Coldplay.

Neither Olsen twin is hitched.

On a more serious note, Russell Brand wrote a beautiful post about his beloved friend Amy Winehouse at For Amy. I'm glad to have read it.

This is my twenty-first instruction for my husband in my ongoing series Instructions for My Husband.

Do you follow celebrity gossip? And if you don't, how exactly do you spend your time instead?

Wordless Wednesday: My kids and ice cream, a retrospective

In honor of National Ice Cream Month, pictures of my kids and ice cream:

PS If you live in New Jersey, here's a list of places with homemade ice cream.

My Baby and Wallace Shawn: My Entry in the Mommy Shorts Baby/Celebrity Lookalikes Contest

My older brother L.E.S.ter suggested on his blog that my newborn son looks like Wallace Shawn. Now of course every time I look at my baby all I see is this:

Instead of this:

What do you think? Is Ziggy a Wallace lookalike? Do I need to get him a pair of baby glasses for a true comparison?

To join the fun and enter your kid in the Mommy Shorts Baby/Celebrity Lookalikes Contest, go here.

Dora the Explorer {From the archives}

I read this review for the first time a few years ago, but came across it again today when goofing around in my blog archives.

It's as funny as I remember it.

If you have ever doubted the many fine points of Dora the Explorer, read this review.

Do I even know myself at all?

I just tried to retrieve my NYT's online account. Of course I don't remember my user name or password - I never do. But what really stumped me was that I had no idea of the answer to my secret question: What is your favorite book?

I myself was so interested in finding out what is my favorite book that I stumbled around the NYT online account interface until I found the question/answer section... only to find that my answer is not visible other than six little black circles.

So, with that clue, six letters no spaces, can anyone tell me, what is my favorite book?

And more importantly, how can I not know this?

Clue: I already tried Walden. That's not it.

Sorta Wordless Wednesday - Our Bethany Beach Vacation

We took a vacation, which is using the term loosely as I was alone with my three small children most of the time, and let's be honest that makes a vacation at best vacation-ish.  (MannahattaMamma pointed out to me it was actually a family trip and that vacation doesn't figure into it at all.)

Still, there were lots of good times. We went peach picking...

... which lead to homemade Peach Cobbler. And was it good, and easy to make. I'll post the recipe soon.

We also ate a huge amount of my favorite food in the world, and local speciality, Maryland Blue Crabs. I am proud to say my kids liked them too - and why shouldn't they like food you get to smash with a hammer?

There was my son Ziggy's delight of steering the car carts at the local grocery store:

And my introduction to an incredibly delicious cookie I never even knew existed (and probably shouldn't), Bergers Cookies from Baltimore:

We read Misty of Chincoteague (a favorite book of my childhood) and got a non-fiction book about Assateague as we planned our August visit there to see the wild ponies:

There were trips to the zoo, the beach, the boardwalk and the local nature center. I'm so grateful to Mel of Delaware Beach Families for sharing all her tips and insider knowledge. If you are planning a visit to the Delaware Beaches follow her @DeBeachMoms on Twitter, she is an incredible resource.

We also got lots of fun ideas and guidance from the awesome duo from Host our Coast, also on Twitter, @HostOurCoast. If you have questions about places to go and things to do in the Bethany Beach area and beyond... they have your answers. And, my kids and I were even lucky enough to meet them in person!

And kids being kids, there was a skinned knee, photographed to email to Daddy:

And when my daughter Kay worried that the photo did not show the true extent of the severity of her injury, there was this (somewhat staged) photo so he would know her anguish:

Not to be outdone, a few days later there would be a visit to "Camp Beebe"

And photos emailed to Daddy of his patched-up daughter in the ER:

Needless to say, we were happy to see Dad when he showed up at the end of the work week to join us for the drive back.

And it was nice to be home again in New Jersey.

Note: It would have been even nicer to be home if my husband and mowed the lawn and watered my beloved garden. Which by the way were the only two things I asked him to do. But that, dear readers, is an instruction for another time...

What I'm Thinking About Sunday Night: Pirates, Boardwalks, and All Things New Jersey

It's Sunday night, and we're back safe and sound in New Jersey. We had a great two-week vacation at the beach where we celebrated July Fourth for about a week, and then spent the other week dressing up like pirates. Oh, and my son also spent a good amount of time grooming his inner toddler metrosexual.

It was all fun times, but I'm glad to be home just the same.

For those of you who are long time Random Handprints readers (for which I am super crazy thankful) you might remember back when I announced I was now writing for ShePosts and Momtrends. 

And today I get to share the exciting news that I am now also a writer for New Jersey Family magazine.

So far, I've written about free outdoor movies and free outdoor concerts, as well as about July being National Blueberry Month and National Picnic Month.

For all the Jersey readers, please let me know if you have anything you'd like me to cover... I'm totally on it.

Rockin the Baby - Wallace Shawn, Baby Tourists and Freshly Applied Lipstick

I had so much fun joining in Shell's Rockin' The Bump linky, and i am glad the fun is back again with Rockin' the Baby.

I couldn't find nearly as many baby photos as I know I have, which just goes to show how old my kids are getting - their baby photos are now one or two computers ago, maybe even one or two email addresses back as well...

I was still able to find a few fun ones. Here is a picture of my newborn son:

And here is a photo of Wallace Shawn.

Do you see the comparison? My brother said my son looked just like Wallace Shawn, and I kid you not, for the first few months of my baby's life that image above was all I could see when I gazed at my adorable lil baby.

I also love my son dressed-up as a wee baby tourist:

And here's Ziggy and me, when he's about six weeks old:



This is my daughter Kay, a day old. We had just come home from the hospital.

And here I am in the hospital with my first born, lil Magpie. If you look closely you can tell that I am totally petrified.

Here's a photo of her sleeping:

And here's newborn Kay asleep:

When I sent each of these photos around, I got told that my baby looked like she was wearing lipstick, in a slightly accusatory way like people really thought I made-up my newborn for her birth announcement photo. (I totally did not do this at all. Either time. Well, who can really remember. It was awhile ago now.)

Did you get any weird comments about your baby or your baby photos? And don't even get me started on the people who called my (admittedly bald) baby a boy, even when she was dressed head-to-toe in pink.

Thank you Shell for this great linky! Also, I would like to request that you continue this year round, moving on to Rockin' the Toddler, Rockin' Back to School, Rockin' the Holidays, and maybe even a Rockin' the Birthday Party.

It's Pirates Week at the Beach!

Our week at the beach has been all about the pirates.

Starting with our neighbors, who my kids are fairly certain really are real-life pirates:

The always popular pirate mini-golf:

My son wearing his ever-present pirate costume:

And my daughter, Magpie, also enjoying the pirate garb:

And look! How cute, pretending she is a pirate with an eye patch like the one on her tee shirt:



And today? That's right, in a stunning example of life imitating art, here is my daughter sporting her very own eye patch:

Which leaves me with just one word left to say... AARGH.

PS The kid (and her eye) is gonna be fine. Her mother - after a trip with three kids to the ER - needs a vacation from her vacation.  I am reminded why I am a vacation avoider in the first place.

Recipe for Gelatin Stars - Fun & Easy to Make and No Artifical Colors

Is it really July 7th and I'm writing another July 4th post? Yep, it's true. But I wanted to pass along the results of my homemade gelatin, even if it means contributing to the phenomenon of Fourth of July sprawl.

In honor of Independence Day, I had posted a few fun picks for red, white & blue desserts that relied on using copious quantities of red and blue food coloring - not the healthiest of options.

So I was inspired to try a more natural take on the patriotic theme when I read this comment from Kelly of Kelly Naturally:

And would you believe, I've never made jello for my children (red 40 sensitivity)! Wonder if there's a natural version of jello?

Yes, Kelly there is! Here's how my gelatin stars with no artificial-colors turned out:

All you need to make your own no-artificial-coloring red and blue gelatin is a box of Knox Gelatin, cranberry juice and blueberry juice. And a couple of cookie cutters in fun shapes.

Follow the directions for Fruit Juice Knox Blox (it's also on the Knox package), but instead of cutting in cubes use cookie cutters.

Ingredients:
4 packets Knox Unflavoured Gelatin
1 cup cold fruit juice (I used cranberry and blueberry for red and blue, but any flavor works)
3 cups hot fruit juice (boiling, or almost boiling)

Directions:
1. Pour the cold fruit juice into a large bowl. Sprinkle the 4 packets of gelatin over the juice and leave for about one minute.
2. Pour the hot fruit juice into the gelatin mixture and stir until gelatin dissolves, about three minutes.
3. Pour the whole mixture into a 9x13 pan. (or 9x9 pan or whatever size pan you have)
4. Chill for about 3 hours, or until your kids wear your patience down and you find yourself letting them slurp the not-quite-firm gelatin directly out of the container.

Once the gelatin is firm, you just cut out the shapes. Couldn't be easier. And of course, the kids love to help.

... and you're done!

 

My kids thought they were delicious, and I have to admit they did taste good. And even better, this version is a much healthier alternative to the artificial colors and sugars found in Jell-o.

Do you have healthier versions of other old favorites?

July Fourth... it goes on and on and on

Here it is July Fifth, but it feels very much like July Fourth because last night's fireworks were cancelled due to rain. So they're showing them tonight.

My kids are of course over joyed. Me? Not so much. (Don't worry, my kids weren't deprived of fireworks yesterday, we watched the display put on by the next town over.)

So far, we have celebrated July Fourth like my children celebrate their birthdays - which means that a one day holiday has been stretched out to several actual days and to what feels like to me, conservatively speaking, several eternities.

There were days of red, white & blue outfits. Yes, even I made sure I had on my red shirt and blue jeans.

There were days of red, white & blue treats. Yes, that is the red, white & blue sandwich I made them for lunch. A triple decker with strawberry jelly, cream cheese and blueberry jelly.

And, my stars, there were night after night of fireworks. Late night fireworks.

When did this happen? Remember when Halloween was one day, not the entire month of October? When did the whole Fourth of July sprawl begin? And more importantly, when will it end?

And now, if you'll excuse me, I have a fireworks show to attend.

I love my country, but please, let this be the last celebration for awhile.