If You're Fighting in the Mommy Wars: You've Already Won

I'm linking-up to Yeah Write. For those of you who were here last week, you will be glad to know this week is not a dream sequence.

I've been following semi-closely the latest round in the "mommy wars".

And this is my conclusion: if you're fighting in the mommy wars, then you've already won.

If you are weighing your options, and making the choice to work or not work, you've already won.

If you are a two-parent family that can afford financially to have one parent stay home, you've already won. I don't care if you are a stay-at-home mom or a stay-at-home dad, your family? Is winning.

If you're a two-parent working family, you've already won, too. In this crappy economy both of you have a job? Your family? Is winning.

If you have the luxury to debate whether it is better for a mom (or dad) to be employed or stay home, then you've already won.

Working moms, stay-at-home moms - who yes, I realize are also working - it's all good. Why try and make one better, or worse, than the other?

So now that we've established that fighting the mommy wars is a poor use of time, let's use all our free time to do something good!

Let's turn our energy to all the people who don't have that choice to be employed outside the home or to stay at home. Let's help the single mom (or dad) who is doing all the childcare and all the working.

Let's help the stay at home mom who wants to work, but can't find a job.

Instead of complaining a mom (or dad) shouldn't be working because she should be home with her kids, why don't we all just give the lady a hand? Invite her kids to go with you to the after-school activity you know they need a ride to, offer to pick them up from soccer so she doesn't have to leave work early, and believe me (not that this should matter) she will return the favor. Work-out-of-the house moms always do, one way or another.

And as long as we have all this extra energy for righting the world instead of fighting over the most personal of decisions, what don't we try and make more tenable out-of-home working arrangements for parents? I would have loved to keep my pre-kid job. But the hours were just too long, and my company had no interest in trying to keep me in a part-time role.

And last, don't think I've forgotten, what about making the stay-at-home mom's life a little easier, too? Personally, I think stay-at-home moms are entitled to some kind of union that limits hours worked per week and gives time off on holidays, or at least pays overtime. Oh wait, they don't get paid... so maybe we could work on that, too.

What do you think?